A Horse Husband's Lament
My wife she has a quarter horse, with flaxen mane and tail
She thinks he is the finest thing that ever jogged a rail
She calls him Dandy Darling, and if the truth I tell,
That fancy pampered quarter horse has made my life pure HELL.
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A year ago today, my devoted, loving fiance became my devoted, loving husband. The day before our wedding, as the sun was coming up, he woke me up and snuck me into the car before all the friends and relatives woke-up. I had been stressing about the flowers I'd planted, which had accidentally been mowed by the mowing company, for most of the day before that. Not that stressing about them would bring them back or anything. He drove me to the barn, and said I should groom my horse because it always makes me relaxed and happy.
I'd gotten Armani a month earlier, on my husband's birthday. Actually, I had gone to the barn for a lesson, and ended up buying Armani as well. Fortunately, I'd had the decency to call him after I signed the check. "Hi Honey, Happy Birthday. Um, remember how we agreed I wouldn't get a horse until after the wedding? Well..." My husband dutifully met me at the barn with carrots to meet his "birthday present to me". We jokingly called Armani "my engagement ring", until I inherited one of those too. This year, my husband spent his birthday photographing us at our second dressage show.
It's been a busy year; new horse, new house, another new horse, new husband. He's been very patient with me. So tonight on our anniversary, I've promised to stay far away from the barn, and spend the evening with my devoted, loving husband.
1 hour ago